[season 01 episode 04]

Sheldon: I can’t believe he fired me.
Leonard: Well, you did call him a glorified high school science teacher whose last successful experiment was lighting his own farts.
Sheldon: In my defense, I prefaced that by saying “with all due respect”.

Sheldon: 我不相信他把我炒了。
Leonard: 好吧，你确实说了，他是个光荣的高中老师，他最近完成的实验就是点燃自己放的屁。
Sheldon: 作为辩护，我要说，我已经在正文前面加了“恕我冒昧”为序了。

[season 01 episode 04]

Sheldon: Here is an interesting turn of events.
Leonard: What? Howard brought a date?
Sheldon: A more plausible explanation is that his work in robotics has made an amazing leap forward.

Sheldon: 这回可有意思了。
Leonard: 咋了？Howard带了个女友？
Sheldon: 一个更可信的解释是他在机器人方面的研究得到了惊人的突破。

[season 01 episode 04]

Sheldon: It occurs to me if I have ever did perfect time machine, I’d just go into the past and give it to myself. That’s eliminating the need for me to invent it in the first place.
Leonard: Interesting.
Sheldon: Yeah, it really kicks the pressure off.
Leonard: Sounds like a breakthrough. Should I call Science Magazine and tell them to hold the cover?
Sheldon: It’s time travel, Leonard, I will have already done that.
Leonard: Then I guess congratulations are in order.
Sheldon: No, congratulations will have been in order.

Sheldon: 我发现，如果我能够制造出完美的时间机器，我就可以回到过去然后把时光机器送给我自己。这样我就不需要从头发明它了。
Leonard: 有意思。
Sheldon: 是啊，这样感觉轻松了不少。
Leonard: 唔听起来像是个重大突破。要不然我给科学美国人打个电话让你上封面？
Sheldon: 这可是时间旅行，Leonard，我应该已经上了封面了。
Leonard: 哦，那我想接下来我就应该恭喜你了。
Sheldon: 不，你已经接下来就恭喜我了。

[season 01 episode 04]

Sheldon: Pleased to meet you, Dr. Gablehauser. How fortunate for you that the university’s chosen to hire you, despite the fact that you’ve done no original research in 25 years, and instead have written a series of popular books that reduce the great concepts of science to a series of anecdotes, each one dumbed down to accommodate the duration of an average bowel movement.
Sheldon: Mahalo.

Sheldon: Gablehauser博士，很高兴认识您。您能被学校聘请真是幸事，25年来您没有发表任何研究成果，而是写了一些科普书，把科学的伟大概念贬低为一堆七卦八卦，每个都烂得可以，只够我们排便时消遣。
Sheldon: 谢谢（夏威夷语）。

[season 01 episode 03]

Sheldon:  At least now you can retrieve the black box from twisted, smoldering wreckage that was once your fantasy of dating her. And analyze the data so that you don’t crash into geek mountain again.

Sheldon:  至少你现在可以从你想要跟她约会的美梦的扭曲冒烟的残骸中翻出黑匣子，仔细分析数据，以免再度坠毁在宅男山里。

[season 01 episode 02]

Sheldon: Great Caesar’s ghost, look at this place.
Leonard: So Penny’s a little messy.
Sheldon: A little messy?
Sheldon: The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy. This is chaos.
Sheldon: Excuse me. Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid. I’m just inferring this is a couch because the evidence suggests the coffee table is having a tiny garage sale.

Sheldon: 我的黄天祖宗啊。瞧瞧这个鬼地方。
Leonard: 唔Penny是有点乱。
Sheldon: “有点”乱？
Sheldon: 曼德布罗特集合才算是有点乱。这根本就是混沌。
Sheldon: 请问，在什么样的组织结构中，一盘子餐具放在沙发上算是合理的。我提到这是沙发，那是因为有证据表明咖啡桌上的微型跳蚤市场正在搞跳楼大甩卖。

理论学习：曼德布罗特集合

[season 01 episode 02]

Leonard: For god’s sake, Sheldon, do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth?
Sheldon: You have a sarcasm sign?

Leonard: 天啊，Sheldon，是不是我每次说话都得举个讽刺牌啊。
Sheldon: 你还有个讽刺牌？

[season 01 episode 02]

Leonard: We are the intellectual descendants of Archimedes. Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the earth. It’s just a matter of …
[try to move the furniture]
Leonard: … I don’t have this. I DON’T HAVE THIS!
[Sheldon helps]
Sheldon: Archimedes would be so proud.
Leonard: Do you have any ideas?
Sheldon: Yes, but they all involve a green lantern and a power ring.
[…after trail and failure]
Sheldon: Ah, gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.

Leonard: 我们是阿基米德智慧的后裔。给我一个支点我可以翘起地球。这只不过是小菜一…
[试着搬动家具]
Leonard: 我不行…我不行！
[Sheldon帮忙]
Sheldon: 阿基米德多自豪啊。
Leonard: 你有招么？
Sheldon: 有的是。不过都需要绿魔灯和魔戒。
[…尝试失败之后]
Sheldon: 啊，重力，汝乃无情之贱妇也。

[season 01 episode 02]

Sheldon: You realize that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy.
Penny: Yes, I know, men can’t fly.
Sheldon: No, no. Let’s assume that they can.
Sheldon: Lois Lane is falling; accelerating at an initial rate of 32 feet per second per second. Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel. Miss lane, who is now traveling at approximately 120 miles an hour, hits them and is immediately sliced into three equal pieces.
Leonard: Unless superman matches her speed and decelerates.
Sheldon: In what space, sir? In what space? She’s two feet above the ground. Frankly, if he really loved her, he’d let her hit the pavement. It’d be a more merciful death.

Sheldon: 你意识到那个场景充满了科学错误了吧。
Penny: 是的，我知道，人是不能飞的。
Sheldon: 不不，咱们先假设人可以飞。
Sheldon: 露易丝·兰恩正在坠落，以每秒32英尺每秒的加速度(9.8m/s²)下落。超人俯冲下去，伸出两只钢筋般的胳膊接住她。兰恩小姐，此时正以每小时120英里的速度(200km/h)坠落，砸到铁臂上，瞬间就被切成三等份。
[Penny 咽唾沫]
Leonard: 不过超人也可以达到她的速度，然后减速。
Sheldon: 有空间吗, 同学？有空间吗？她离地面只有2英尺高。坦白讲，如果他真的爱她，他还不如让她摔到地面上。那还算是对她仁慈点。

[season 01 episode 01]
Sheldon: So if a photon is directed through a plane with two slits in it and either slit is observed, it will not go through both slits. If it’s unobserved, it will. However, if it’s observed after it’s left the plane but before it hits its target, it won’t have gone through both slits.
Leonard: Agreed. what’s your point?
Sheldon: There’s no point, I just think it’s a good idea for a t-shirt.

Sheldon: 所以如果一个光子穿过一个有两条窄缝的挡板，如果两条窄缝中任何一条被观测，则光子不会同时穿过这两条窄缝。如果不观测则不然。但是，如果观测发生在光子离开挡板而未击中目标的时候，它不可能同时穿过两条裂隙。
Leonard: 同意。你想说什么？
Sheldon: 没什么。我只是觉得这个设计用在T恤上挺不错。

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